Monday, September 7, 2009

Where have you been?

Hello all my blog friends!

It is hard to believe that it has been over a month since I last updated my blog... Actually it is going on almost 2 months. :(

Well my only excuse is that sometimes life has away of getting in the way of our plans.
Like most of us know, life can get rather hectic at times, and it has been beyond hectic in our household these past couple of months.

We are a homeschooling family, and we start our new school year in August. Ed travels a lot, so that leaves me as the sole parent to take care of it all. It works out for us in the end, but it can get rather daunting to say the least. I also was trying to run our business while Ed was away, and came to the conclusion that something had to give, and seeing as I have strived for the past 21 years to try and keep my priorities straight when it came to raising a family, I knew that I had to make a decision about the business. My children have always come before anything else in life, and I felt that they were getting the short end of the deal, so I scaled way back on the business, and that has helped immensely.

I also have been struggling with some serious health issues that I really did not want to face the reality of.
I think there may be many of you ladies out there who may understand or identify with the sacrifice of self. I have spent the last 21 years raising 5 beautiful children who I absolutely adore. It was not and is not in me to have these children and leave them to their own devises. I was and have been a complete and total hands on mother. I have stayed at home to raise them. I have played with them, read to them, snuggled them, laughed with them and cried with them. I gave them all the love, time and attention that a person can give, and to that I have no regrets.
The thing that I failed to do... was take care of me! I spent these past 21 years totally neglecting myself, and now I am facing the consequences of that neglect.

Last winter I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and put on oral medication. Well if that wasn't enough my lab work also came back with triglycerides through the roof, and now another medication. Within a month of starting the meds I started experiencing bad headaches. Another trip to the doctors confirmed what I expected... High Blood Pressure, and more meds. Within a few months of that I was then diagnosed with Anemia and was put on iron supplements and progesterone pills to try and combat the blood loss that was causing the anemia. :(
I sit here today now taking twice the amount of medication then my 70 year old mother! It has been a struggle to say the least! I have always had great health, and this seemed to come from nowhere... But did it? No, I have been heading here for the last 21 years. There is a reason why they call them the silent killers.

Getting my blood sugars under control has been a difficult thing to accomplish, but I think I am finally there. Yeah, me! That means no insulin shots!!!! :) I will probably always have to take the oral medication for the diabetes which really bums me out, but that is so much better then having to give yourself two shots a day. Been there, done that, and I hated it.

Now I am working on weight loss through both cardio and strength training. Making healthy food choices, and taking time for MYSELF!!!! That is such a strange concept for me. After 21 years of putting everyone and everything before myself I found it difficult to think about myself. I am slowly learning that it is OK to say, "Please get out of the bathroom while mommy takes a bath". In the past I could not have said that without feeling tremendous amounts of guilt. I give myself an hour a day for my workouts, and the children have come to learn that it's "mom time", and I am not to be disturbed. It took a week or so to make them understand that we meant this and the older ones are great to help with the younger ones if needed.

My goal and hope is to get off as much of this medication as possible and be as healthy as I can. It is a long road before me, and I know there will be good days and bad days, but I know I can do this. I have the most loving and supportive family anyone could ask for.

I know this post has nothing to do with primitives,remodeling or anything close to what you all probably would prefer to read, but it is where I am at and why I have pretty much been absent these past two months.

I can't promise that I will be posting anything new everyday or even every week, but as I am slowly getting things under control I will be posting projects that I am working on or have finished, where we are at with the remodel, and anything else that may pop up.

Thank you to all my blog friends for your many emails and concerns. I have missed catching up with you all. Have a very blessed evening!


11 comments:

  1. I have missed you and was so happy to see your post. You are a wonderful mother and now a wiser one too. I am sorry for your health concerns but I am confident that you will do what needs to be done to get controll over these issues. Thank you for sharing. It is a good eye opener. I am sure I am not the only one who reads your blog that also needs to make changes. I will keep you in my prayers. Keep up the good work

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  2. Hi Kim,

    I am so glad you are taking care of yourself now! You can't be any good to those kids if you aren't healthy!! As mom's we sometimes tip the balance in favor of others instead of ourselves don't we!! This week I decided to make some changes in my life too so your post hit home with me!!

    So glad you are back!!

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  3. I hope you are successful with all your hard work! Glad you are taking time for yourself. I also struggle with doing the same thing. Feeling guilty if I'm not constantly working or cleaning. Enjoy your day. Glad you're back!

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  4. Kim,
    I can so relate to this! There comes a time in a mother's life when she has to do what's best for her both physically and mentally. If that means taking some "me time" then that's just fine. It does not in any way mean that we are neglecting our children...it is, in my opinion, what is best for everyone. I so hope you are feeling better soon.

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  5. I have missed you too Kim, I am glad to hear you are taking care of yourself. So sorry to hear about your health problems, I hope you are feeling better soon and that you can cut back on meds once things get better. Take care and hope things get better there real soon.

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  6. I hope things work out for you and your family sweetheart...Being a mommy isn't easy that's for sure ,and everyday life can sure take it's toll on a person.....best of luck to you hun..will be praying for you and your family.....

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  7. Kim,
    Glad you are doing better...its good to hear you are making "me" time. I know first hand with homeschooling, this is so hard to do. Don't stop taking care of yourself..the kids WILL benefit from it in the long run.
    Hugs,
    Anne

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  8. I think a lot of us can identify! I know I can! I am still in the caregiver positoin with taking care of my Daddy and my grandaughter for the past almost 5 years.
    Now that I suffer daily with aches & pains, (back & both knees) I know I need to do something! And a good check-up is in order soon.
    I hope your changes are making you feel better. Take care!

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  9. Hi Kim,

    I totally understand. We're a homeschooling family too and it's hard to keep a balance of everything we need to do and everything we want to do! I feel guilty not visiting people's blogs as much as I would like. As far as doing too many things, my husband has helped me learn to say no sometimes.

    I will pray for you. I think that's a big mistake (us) moms make....not taking care of ourselves like we should.

    Do take care of yourself and just post when you can!

    Have a great day!
    Tammy

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  10. My husband and I are in the same boat! His triglicerides are in the 400's. We're both dieting and trying to get our kids to diet.
    Take care of yourself!
    I know what you mean, I have also been the stay at home mom (mostly) of 5 kids and haven't taken much time to take care of myself.
    Good luck!
    Beth

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  11. Hi Kim,
    I was right there with you until I radically changed my eating habits! Did you know that another silent killer is high fructose corn syrup (HFCS)? It's even in our breads and other foods that you think are "safe"! We only eat eggs from vegetarian fed hens and make everything from scratch! Organic milk ONLY! No sodas or sugary drinks either. I know this sounds 'radical' but as a person who is a plant scientist, I know the dangers of the chemicals in our food supply. We have cut out all HFCS and don't eat out at restaurants any more except as a treat once a month! I am still struggling with my weight (some genetics at play here!) but I don't take any pills and I feel great! Continue the good fight and take care of yourself!
    Good luck and

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