Monday, September 7, 2009

Where have you been?

Hello all my blog friends!

It is hard to believe that it has been over a month since I last updated my blog... Actually it is going on almost 2 months. :(

Well my only excuse is that sometimes life has away of getting in the way of our plans.
Like most of us know, life can get rather hectic at times, and it has been beyond hectic in our household these past couple of months.

We are a homeschooling family, and we start our new school year in August. Ed travels a lot, so that leaves me as the sole parent to take care of it all. It works out for us in the end, but it can get rather daunting to say the least. I also was trying to run our business while Ed was away, and came to the conclusion that something had to give, and seeing as I have strived for the past 21 years to try and keep my priorities straight when it came to raising a family, I knew that I had to make a decision about the business. My children have always come before anything else in life, and I felt that they were getting the short end of the deal, so I scaled way back on the business, and that has helped immensely.

I also have been struggling with some serious health issues that I really did not want to face the reality of.
I think there may be many of you ladies out there who may understand or identify with the sacrifice of self. I have spent the last 21 years raising 5 beautiful children who I absolutely adore. It was not and is not in me to have these children and leave them to their own devises. I was and have been a complete and total hands on mother. I have stayed at home to raise them. I have played with them, read to them, snuggled them, laughed with them and cried with them. I gave them all the love, time and attention that a person can give, and to that I have no regrets.
The thing that I failed to do... was take care of me! I spent these past 21 years totally neglecting myself, and now I am facing the consequences of that neglect.

Last winter I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and put on oral medication. Well if that wasn't enough my lab work also came back with triglycerides through the roof, and now another medication. Within a month of starting the meds I started experiencing bad headaches. Another trip to the doctors confirmed what I expected... High Blood Pressure, and more meds. Within a few months of that I was then diagnosed with Anemia and was put on iron supplements and progesterone pills to try and combat the blood loss that was causing the anemia. :(
I sit here today now taking twice the amount of medication then my 70 year old mother! It has been a struggle to say the least! I have always had great health, and this seemed to come from nowhere... But did it? No, I have been heading here for the last 21 years. There is a reason why they call them the silent killers.

Getting my blood sugars under control has been a difficult thing to accomplish, but I think I am finally there. Yeah, me! That means no insulin shots!!!! :) I will probably always have to take the oral medication for the diabetes which really bums me out, but that is so much better then having to give yourself two shots a day. Been there, done that, and I hated it.

Now I am working on weight loss through both cardio and strength training. Making healthy food choices, and taking time for MYSELF!!!! That is such a strange concept for me. After 21 years of putting everyone and everything before myself I found it difficult to think about myself. I am slowly learning that it is OK to say, "Please get out of the bathroom while mommy takes a bath". In the past I could not have said that without feeling tremendous amounts of guilt. I give myself an hour a day for my workouts, and the children have come to learn that it's "mom time", and I am not to be disturbed. It took a week or so to make them understand that we meant this and the older ones are great to help with the younger ones if needed.

My goal and hope is to get off as much of this medication as possible and be as healthy as I can. It is a long road before me, and I know there will be good days and bad days, but I know I can do this. I have the most loving and supportive family anyone could ask for.

I know this post has nothing to do with primitives,remodeling or anything close to what you all probably would prefer to read, but it is where I am at and why I have pretty much been absent these past two months.

I can't promise that I will be posting anything new everyday or even every week, but as I am slowly getting things under control I will be posting projects that I am working on or have finished, where we are at with the remodel, and anything else that may pop up.

Thank you to all my blog friends for your many emails and concerns. I have missed catching up with you all. Have a very blessed evening!